let's talk about friendship awards

[dick benbow]

One of the more recent niceities has been the recognition of unusual or unique koi that the show passes by yet get honored by visiting clubs with this type of award.
But I'm beginning to see some ugliness trying to creep in and want your thoughts or suggestions.
Here's the scenerio.....club A is surprised by club B with an award in their show. The following year club a responds to club B. The friendships is warming for both sides. So club A goes to another show and makes 2 awards that year. However the second club does not respond the following year. So now the resentment builds because it was not returned.
It may sound pretty petty but I am seeing some unhealthy resentment being built up < right or wrong>. So is that something that needs to be handled and planned for by the clubs, even to the point of commissioning an individual to attend solely for that purpose?

your thoughts please.....

[Russell Peters]

Quote: Originally Posted by dick benbow One of the more recent niceties has been the recognition of unusual or unique koi that the show passes by yet get honored by visiting clubs with this type of award. But I'm beginning to see some ugliness trying to creep in and want your thoughts or suggestions. Here's the scenerio.....club A is surprised by club B with an award in their show. The following year club a responds to club B. The friendships is warming for both sides. So club A goes to another show and makes 2 awards that year. However the second club does not respond the following year. So now the resentment builds because it was not returned. It may sound pretty petty but I am seeing some unhealthy resentment being built up < right or wrong>. So is that something that needs to be handled and planned for by the clubs, even to the point of commissioning an individual to attend solely for that purpose? your thoughts please.....

I was always taught that when you give something it is not done because you expect anything in return. You give because you care and there should be no strings attached. If you give to get, you will always be disappointed.

[PapaBear]

Quote: Originally Posted by Russell Peters I was always taught that when you give something it is not done because you expect anything in return. You give because you care and there should be no strings attached. If you give to get, you will always be disappointed.

Thank you for saying exactly what I was thinking as I read Dick's post. A friendship award is an EXTENSION of friendship from one to another, not an invitation for payback. When you need payback for a "gift given" you cheapen both.

[JasPR]

Larry nailed it. It is a symbol of friendship not a promissory note. People need to 'lighten up'. Looks like someone is looking for trouble where there is none? JR

[lypope]

I agree completely that a gift is just that - a gift with no expectation of reciprocity. I was proud to present a Friendship Award at the OKC show last May from IKONA - since we're an internet-based club that is just getting off the ground we have little or no expectation of holding a show in the near-term, but our members are spread out around the country and we are happy to present Friendship Awards at any show any one of us is attending.

[mstrseed]

Well I know of one club that does not put on a show, but sponsors awards at some shows and sometimes even gives friendship awards........why do they do it????

It sure is not for reciprocation , maybe its that they love Koi............

This is the Austin Koi Club.............................................. ....

[RayJordan]

The Texas Koi & Fancy GF Society decided long ago to buy and send a friendship award along when any of our members attended another clubs show. It is up to the members present to select the recipent.

I think it is a bonus to recognize someone that didn't receive a major award but still had some special koi entered and was one of the local show volunteers. WHen I bring a award I usually try to look for a unique and beautiful koi to acknowledge.

[MCA]

Yep....a gift is definitely NOT a "swap". Expecting something in returns lessens the gift and the giver.

Our club lets members give a Friendship Award anytime one of us attends another club's show......and remembers to get one of the gifts. It has happened that someone forgot to take one....or we were out and had not reordered a stack.

We just got a dozen stacked up from the vendor...so we are good to go for a couple of years.

[velvetbone]

Quote: Originally Posted by Russell Peters I was always taught that when you give something it is not done because you expect anything in return. You give because you care and there should be no strings attached. If you give to get, you will always be disappointed.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Could this be the sign of the times? Not just for this particular case but in general with society? Expecting something in return, just because?

I sometimes see this with my job. I teach. And if you can't tell by my grammer,sentence structure and spelling it isn't English.

But still, I do see this at school and on the sport fields that my children play on. Luckily they have had great coaches trying to renforce the correct attitude.
Sorry if I am out of line with these observation considering I am still a newbe.

Thanx Vince

[Russell Peters]

Quote: Originally Posted by velvetbone Couldn't have said it better myself. Could this be the sign of the times? Not just for this particular case but in general with society? Expecting something in return, just because? I sometimes see this with my job. I teach. And if you can't tell by my grammer,sentence structure and spelling it isn't English. But still, I do see this at school and on the sport fields that my children play on. Luckily they have had great coaches trying to renforce the correct attitude. Sorry if I am out of line with these observation considering I am still a newbe. Thanx Vince

No need to apologize, you are correct, this attitude has sprung up in all aspects of our lives.

Russ